My Kids Are A Huge Disappointment

I promised myself that there was nothing my kids could ever do that would cause me to be disappointed in them.

I was wrong.

Jurassic-ParkTonight, my boys were watching Jurassic Park in the living room while I worked in the dining room. I was eavesdropping on Steven Spielberg’s masterpiece when my kids’ voices got in the way:

Connor: “That’s Nicolas Cage. The guy starting the tour.”

Cam: “Are you sure?”

Connor: “Yep.”

At 13 and 11, my boys have a pretty solid understanding of age-appropriate movies, from actors to special FX to story writing, so I was a little surprised to hear them claim Nicolas Cage was in Jurassic Park – a movie that they have seen 3 or 4 times.

Me: “Guys, Nic Cage isn’t in Jurassic Park.”

Connor: “Yeah, he is. Come see.”

They backed up the video to the previous scene and played it for me.  Sam Neil and Laura Dern got in their vehicles. Bob Peck warned of an incoming storm. The cars set off on the tour.

Connor: “See…Nicolas Cage.”

Me: “Where?”

Connor, referencing the actor frozen on screen: “Right there.”

. . .
nicolas-cage-raising-arizonaMe: “Um…Connor…Nicolas Cage is a white guy…”

Blank looks.

Me: “…with weird hair…”

Blank looks.

Me: “…freaks out a lot.”

Connor: “Right. I meant Samuel L. Jackson. Nicolas Cage was in National Treasure.”

Me: “Much better.”

Kids…they’ve seen one actor, they’ve seen them all. Just sad.

1 Comment

  1. Someday, I hope to be confused with Cage…or Sam Jackson…whichever.

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